Do you feel like a different person after you become a parent?

My hubby and I have been TTC our first child for over 2 years now. I often daydream about what it would be like to be a parent. I'm sure it's something that you just can't even imagine! How did becoming a parent change you as a person and your life?Do you feel like a different person after you become a parent?
Although I am so glad I kept her, my daughter was not planned. I spent a whole week deciding what I was going to do, especially as the sperm-donor was not exactly parent material. I wasn't a bad person, exactly, but I was selfish as only a single person can be selfish, and not all that responsible....I ran from everything I thought I wouldn't be able to finish. When I realized I was pregnant, I thought, ';I can't run from this........EVER. Not in two years, or when the baby's eighteen....I won't be able to quit after I start, no matter what.'; That was a scary thought. Also, my mom said something to me I'll never forget.....';A good mother or father is someone who is worthy of emulation.'; Simply put, you need to make sure that if your kid wants to copy you or grow up to be just like you, that that is a good thing. It doesn't mean that you have to be perfect or that you have to know everything, but you need to knock off some of those jerky habits and try to be a GOOD person, darnit! And that's not always fun, let me tell you! (Sometimes I get sick of taking the high road and being understanding and patient......do not want! Bleh!)





My patience, by the way, is both better than it has ever been and shorter than a toothpick broken in half. Amazing how peanut butter smeared into the carpet by willing fingers will make you want to knock holes in the wall, as if that would help.





I've learned that there are things you can do to furniture and clothing that, contradicting every TV ad out there, nothing, repeat, NOTHING, will fix it.





I've also learned that you can really define someone's character by watching what they do when they think no one is looking.





My child has made me more responsible, but she has also given me an excuse to play with trains, swing on that swingset at the park, skip down the sidewalk, and blow bubbles in my milk.





One thing, though, that my mom forgot to tell me (or maybe it was just one of those things she knew I'd figure out eventually) was when my daughter was about two years old, and just getting over a very bad cold. I had spent restless nights waking up and checking on her (like you do when they're newborns, you poke them to make sure they're still alive because you can't see them breathe or something), listening for coughs and crying, kissing fevered foreheads, and was so relieved that she was getting better that I almost cried. Then I realized something.....I WAS NEVER GOING TO STOP WORRYING. Ever. Not when she was ten, sixteen (Oh God), or twenty.....hell, Fifty. I would always worry whether she was happy or not, safe, making enough money, hanging around the right friends, keeping away from strangers, getting the right kind of help and attention from her husband later on......I would always, always worry. I burst into tears and called my mom, almost accusing, like it was her fault that no one told me. She just said, ';I know. I still worry about you all the time, even though you're doing wonderful. It never ends, sweetie.'; I think that that shock hit me hardest of all, that that little tiny girl (well, not so tiny at 4 feet, but still!) would always, always be the main drive in my life, my greatest gift from God and the source of my most dreaded fears.





How does becoming a parent change you? It takes away old fears and gives you new ones, makes life harder but so much sweeter, and forces you to see the world as it was meant to be seen....with love.Do you feel like a different person after you become a parent?
you bet! i married at 21, gave birth to my first baby at 22 and gave birth to my second baby at 23. parenting has been very much a challenge for me and my hubby because it's raising up two intelligent girls who have totally different personalities. i became a totally different person because being a mom made me more responsible, caring and patient. it's been years since i smoked, went out for drinks and partied all night. i still pamper myself by doing the things i love. no regrets, though because after all the hardships of being a parent, a kiss and a hug from my kids makes it all worth it.
Well for one, you learn how to share really quick. You start putting their needs before your own. The love you will feel is just overwhelming some days.
What I have seen close friends around me - it sure changes almost everything, not just the external lifestyle but what trigger, tinkle from inside.





As long as one wants to share that life with the child, love the child, wants to take care of the child, changes will occur. Unless someone just ignore the child ever takes place!!!





I have seen this friend, at first he tries to upkeep his usual social life etc, but really it is a matter of time the focus naturally shifts and he enjoys the shift - spending more time with his kid and family. He still does some exotic bagpacking travelling on his own once a while but you can tell ... there's a shift - he does not want just the usual lifestyle he had only, he will balance more for what the family and definitely the child need of him.





Me - hahaha - the nearest was babysitting this friend's doggie for two months - it changed my lifestyle - worrying about it, enjoying the love the little doggie showers, tickle by the funny acts and flustered by the naughty acts too! Life was no longer just about oneself, there was this responsibility for the little one. It comes in a package but it is just so good still having the doggie - Oh I miss those times : O





And even the doggie triggers a lot within me, seeing things differently, Boy! I am sure a real baby will do a lot more!!!
it makes you responsible really really fast.
I have so much more to look forward to in my life! Everyday of my life is so exciting now. I use to dread weekdays, but now everyday is like the weekend with my daughter here. I also can't believe I could ever become so responsible as I have. Tell you the truth I was a little worried I wouldn't be responsible enough, but it all just came so naturally!





Also, I knew I would love my baby but no one could have ever told me I would love her this much. Even everyone telling you all this now they could never explain how you'll feel, it's beyond words!





I believe God allows us all to have babies when the time is right for us. I had a miscarriage before I had my daughter and believed that it all happens for a reason. Your time will come and you will know the wait is worth it for the blessing you will receive! Good luck and God Bless
every aspect of your life changes
it changes everything who and what you are and do
It changes you whole life, the baby must come first always, so your partying days are over. You can't just pick up and go. I had my Mom watch mine for special things but until they got older we took them where ever we went. I had 4 in 6 yrs so it was a struggle sometimes, but I wouldn't change a minute of it. They all grew up to be great kids. Youngest is 40 now so my time now is mine. Now I am babysitting the great grand kids for special things
All I can say is enjoy your sleep now b/c you will never sleep as soundly again once you have children. You will always have a little voice inside of you keeping you aware and awake to some degree.... that worries about your kids.
well as my 8 year old insightfully said yesterday 'Mommy, you dont' have a life. You do everything for us and don't have your own friends or play at all. It's like when you become a parent, that your life ends' lol. She was spot on. I am single, so I don't even get laid anymore... this is it for 18 years, and I couldn't be happier. Although just ONCE, I would appreciate going somewhere without getting those snowsuits and boots and gloves on the kids... and just walk out the door...





Here's one for you. 3 people were asked what they would do with a vacation. the first, said that she would go to Hawii and sit in the sun for a week, she worked indoors as a secretary and that sounded great to her. The second one, who worked as a waitress at a truck stop said that she would go to a womens' reatreat where no men would lear at her. And they all looked at the mother and asked her what her holiday would be. And she said.... ';I would go to the bathroom and close the door and stare at it and listen to the silence and realize that for the first time in years... I am peeing alone'... lol





I like that one
im only 19 but becoming a mother was the best expirience of my life...i couldnt even imagine my life without my son. my son has changed my whole life around for the better.
It's utterly amazing to realize how much you can love another person. Every day you look at your child and think ';you're amazing';. Even after they start growing up, sure they make you angry sometimes but they give you a smile, hug or kiss and you almost want to cry. You just love them so much.





It took us almost 7 years to have a baby. Because of that time, I think we are able to appreciate our son (and his baby brother due in 4 weeks) even more. I never take any day with him for granted, because I know how close I came to not having him.





Good Luck to you!
After I had my daughter, suddenly it wasn't all about me anymore. And I never thought I could instantly love someone like that. Your life will forever be changed, but in a good way! Babies are little angels.
Although I gave carried her, gave birth, nursed, and cared for my baby girl, I didn't truly feel like a mom until she could say mommy. I then had the revelation that I am someone's mom. The whole experience was awesome. There is no bonding experience that tops nursing. The biggest change is that you are no longer one being. Everything that you do is for the benefit of your child/children. And you consider your child/children in all of your decisions. You think of their smile or hear their voice while you are at work or play. It is a joy and an awesome priviledge to be a parent.
once i had my children, i completely settled down, my focus was only on my family not me, my children come first, i want nothing but the best for them, i used to skip school, let home work slide, i ride my kids to get to school everyday and do thier homework. I know i have to live for them, i know all the decisions i make and everything i do will affect them so i think about them while making any decisions. It is amazing how fast your veiws on stuff changes completely once you are a parent, because its not about yourself anymore its all about them.
Yes, becoming a parent really changed things for my wife and I. Suddenly we were caring for this beautiful, helpless creature. Our daughter was totally dependent on us. There's nothing quite like the feeling of deep need - she literally would have died without our care.





We were thrust into a situation where we didn't always know what was going on. She'd cry and we'd try to figure out why. Was she hurt? Hungry? Did she have an ear ache? We couldn't tell at first. Then, as our experience level grew, we began to recognize the category of her cries - when something was really important and when she was just cranky, for example.





Our oldest daughter was the first granddaughter in the family, so we had to adjust to our parents greeting the baby first, then giving us a cursory nod. The baby took over our relationships for a time!





Everywhere we went we carried a million things with us. I don't know how we actually made it out the door!





Being a parent is a ton of work. My estimate is that it's 90% work. Some of that work is drudgery. But here's the thing: the remaining 10% make it all worth it! The first smile. The first word. The first step. The first success on the potty. The first day of school. And, for our oldest, walking her down the aisle at her wedding.





I'm so glad to hear that you are looking forward to having a child. As I look back on 25+ years of parenting, I can say it was worth it and it went by far too quickly!





When I submit this text I will pause and pray for you and your husband. May God bless you.
it changed everything, before i was a mommy i could go out with friends get drunk and not worry whom is at home sleeping, i was free to do what ever and be whom ever,





Now that i have my 2 girls, i have to be care, I'm the responsible one,


looking out for them, loving them and taking care of there each need,


Being a mommy is a full time job


and i love it, i wouldn't trade my life back for a billion dollars..


Everything changed when i gave birth too them, when i heard there first words when they said my name...


Life has changed and for the better
well i became a young parent..age 19.. and i realized how immature my friends could be and how dangerous half of the things they do are.. and i matured pretty quick..alcohol and partying doesnt attrack me at all..i did go out once but all i could think about was my baby and ended up going home early.!! your whole world turns around..and your views on life are different...opinions will change.
you dont worry about the little things anymore. The only thing I worry about is my baby and is he healthy and happy. I used to go out partying and now I could careless about partying. I always have him on my mind. Its hard becaues even when I try to sleep I am always thinking about my baby and the next day
My whole life changed for the better : ) I used to go shopping for myself all the time and think about what I could do. After my children were born my whole way of thinking changed. I very rarely think about I need, I always think about them and what they need or want. It is amazing how much you can care about another person. They consume your whole life. It's awesome.





Heather
It's hard to describe. The minute I held my son and laid eyes on him was the best day of my life! It made me feel so special. My life changed because I was no longer partying or going to clubs. I didn't care because my son was number one and much more important than going dancing with friends.I felt more responsible ( I was 21)
It actually didn't change me as a person. I've always loved kids. My mother has pictures of me at 5, 6yrs playing school and bossing all the little neighborhood kids around. I babysat and nannied through my teen and college years, got a degree in child development and early childhood education and couldn't wait to have children of my own.


I'm a mom of 3 boys and a baby girl who range in ages from almost 10yrs to almost 6ms old. If anything, my kids have kept me young. Yeah, I took on a lot more responsibilities and chores when you become a parent, but I've also spent a lot of time chasing them around outside, playing with them on the floor, watching kid movies, laughing at their comments and jokes etc.


My life style is something that changed drastically. To start, I love 4 people more than anything else in the world. After having my oldest, I didn't think I could love anything as much as him, but I was wrong big time. The four of them are the center of my world, the apple of my eye and I can imagine life without them. Next, I learned not to read into everything. Having a degree in child development, I was 100% sure I'd have no worries or issues the day I brought my first home. I learned very quickly though that babies don't go by the books I learned in school. My son didn't eat X food every day. He didn't sleep X amount of hours, go through X amount of diapers each day or fall asleep when I did X. That was a big wake up call and I learned quickly that I'd have to figure things out on my own. I use to be a good sleeper and need 8-9hrs a night to function. Since I've had kids, I can fully function on 5-6hrs easily. I've lost touch with a few friends here and there, but have gained new ones, many of whom are mothers as well. My husband and I don't spend as much time together as a couple as we use to. Between 9pm and 10:30pm is about all the time we have together without a person under 4'6. We go out on ';dates'; about once a month, but I'd really like some more time together. I've learned to multitask EXTREMELY well. I'll be making dinner, grading papers, helping my sons with their homework, emptying the dishwasher and talking on the phone all at the same time. I've learned to drive a truck. That may seem random, but with 4 kids, 2 of which are in car seats, you can't drive a car.


Whatever I've given up or lost was well worth it. I love being a mother.


Best Wishes =]
Its changed my life, I havent peed alone is 6 yrs. Honestly, I became a parent and ceased to exist independently of them, I am not allowed to do anything without them, forget personal belongings, forget time alone, forget you are a person with wants and needs of your own, forget that your name really isnt ';mommy i want';, forget that your name isnt ';are you ___'s mom';, forget the luxury of bathing alone, using the restroom alone, being able to cook an entire meal without telling someone to get away from the stove, for the first year for year forget what the original color of your clothing is, or what it means to just throw in a load of clothes, forget throwing something together for dinner, forget being able to sit in your own bed and relax without worrying when you hear silence, being able to go the store without taking wipes, sippy cups, or atleast knowing where the bathroom, forget sleep you'll not be getting any for many years. Forget having peace of mind, you lose that, your mind I mean. Forget Victorias Secret, you'll start wondering if she had a secret for getting the kids to go to sleep before you. Forget being you, you are never you again after kids, you become mom.